The Silent Shadows of Doubt

“Dear Eve,I feel like I’m losing myself in my relationship. Every time my boyfriend goes out with his coworkers (many of them attractive women). I’m overwhelmed by jealousy and fear. He hasn’t done anything wrong, but I can’t shake this gnawing feeling that I’m not enough. I know it’s my own abandonment issues speaking, but it’s so hard to stop these thoughts from taking over. How do I silence this fear and trust in him, and in myself?”

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Darling, I’ve seen this story before. It’s not new, and it’s not yours alone. Fear, particularly the fear of abandonment is an old ghost, one that loves to haunt the brave-hearted. But let me tell you a secret: ghosts only have power when we feed them.

Once, many lifetimes ago, I loved a man who had the world at his feet. Women surrounded him: beautiful, charming, and eager to catch his eye. I told myself I was strong enough to bear it, that love meant enduring the ache of uncertainty. But, in truth, I was feeding a silent shadow, the fear that if I wasn’t perfect, he’d slip away.

You see, trust isn’t built in moments of certainty. It’s forged in the fire of doubt. And love, real love, isn’t about knowing your partner will never be tempted, it’s about knowing you’re strong enough to survive, even if they are.

This isn’t about him, my dear. It never was. This is about the part of you that still believes you’re not enough, the part that fears being left behind because somewhere, someone once made you feel replaceable. That wound runs deep, but here’s the truth: you are not their mistake, and his actions tonight do not define your worth.

So what do you do? You breathe. You remind yourself that he is not the sum of your fears. You talk to him, not from a place of accusation, but from a place of vulnerability. Tell him how these moments feel, not to control him but to help him understand the battle you’re fighting within.

And most importantly, you build. Build the kind of love for yourself that no absence, no party, no flirtation could ever threaten. Because, darling, the only person who can truly abandon you is you.

Tonight, instead of imagining him surrounded by temptation, imagine yourself surrounded by strength. Dance, read, call a friend, choose to live fully in your own power. For when you find joy in your own company, no one else’s presence, or absence will ever shake your foundation.

Trust begins not with him, but with you. And when you find that trust within yourself, you’ll see the shadows of doubt for what they truly are: echoes, not truths.

Now tell me, my love, what story will you choose to write for yourself tonight?

Eve Éclat